“Created to be a Help Meet” by Michael & Debbie Pearl
I wonder if you can help me please?
My sister has recently given the “Created to be a Help meet” book to a couple who were having marital problems after just two weeks of being married, without her having read them herself. When she told me about the book that her daughter recommended to her, I googled in their names and what I read was not very “kosher” and some discussion blogs exposing them were quite shocking to say the least. As I have not read the book myself, and was thinking of ordering it before I checked up on them, one of the discussion blogs which I found quite helpful because it had extracts of the book with the page references included. I have read some bad things concerning the book “To train up a child” and the “Holy Sex” book. I shall certainly not be buying any of their books, but my sister has come to their defense, saying that she has not seen anything wrong with the CTBAHM book and doesn’t want to accept any criticism against the other two books.
I would appreciate your thoughts if, of course, you know of them so that I could eventually pass them on to my sister. Thank you.
Moriel does not recommend the so-called ministry of Michael and Debbie Pearl. There is no scriptural support for too much of what they teach and anybody who recommends “pulling a baby’s hair” on TV in the name of Christianity is deranged, not teaching Christianity. His views are cultic and potentially dangerous.
There is no scriptural basis for so much of what he teaches about children and about sex. Like all KJV only advocates he is frankly often ignorant theologically. Men like this discredit Christian home schooling and to provoke laws against the rights of parents to corporally correct their children.
Emotionally and spiritually insecure people gravitate toward quacks like this whom they falsely imagine to be spiritual and strong. I have yet to encounter a despot like Mr. Pearl who does not have serious spiritual issues in their own lives. The heavy-handed misuse of authority they exude is an expression of a need for power to address their own insecurities.
Your sister is probably looking for a protective spiritual authority to provide a secure upbringing for her children. Not getting it from the Lord through her husband and the eldership of her church, she looks elsewhere. Only instead of protection it is abuse, and she is too short-sighted to know it. Her husband, if she has one, needs to exercise loving but firm responsibility as the head of the family and get her and their children away from this threat to his loved ones.
I cannot engage in personal counseling with people whom I do not know; that is anyway a pastoral function. But you asked for my view so you have it.
Finally, there is one further thing I will leave you with. The very idea of a self proclaimed expert on children and on sex is in itself unscriptural. Pastoral ministry or teaching ministry must teach the whole counsel of God, not only focus on select issues to the negation of the rest. When you see somebody focusing on one or two issues only – particularly if it is authoritative, you are looking at heavy shepherding (Nicolaitianism) and usually a cult in the making.
When I see someone writing books concentrated on sex (which scripture does not do), I head for the hills. It often means immorality is lurking. In the proper context sexual issues must be addressed and addressed scripturally. However, when you see preachers and so called Christian authors harping on about something of a sexual nature consistently, a red flag should automatically go up. When one or two subjects are amplified, but the other issues of God’s word are ignored or skimmed over – look out.
I have no problem with the King James Version, but Pearl seems to subscribe to placing the KJV above the original languages, which is heresy.
These are the Pearl’s. Keep away from unbalanced people like them. They only serve to cause the world and the media to unjustly stereotype the rest of us as stupid religious hooligans.